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Looking after Children

Imam al-Bukhari Al-Adab al-Mufrad – by Imam Al-
Bukhari – – A code For Everyday
Living: The Example of the Early
Muslims
Imam al-Bukhari is world-
renowned for his major work, “al Jami’ al Sahih” (“Sahih al
Bukhari”), but he has also
produced a number of other
works, including “Al-Adab al-
Mufrad”, here translated into
English. This book is a compilation of ahadith on Islamic morals and
manners from various sources. V. Looking after children 45. A child is a source of both
honour and cowardice 84. ‘A’isha said, “Abu Bakr
said, ‘By Allah, there is no man
on the face of the earth that I
love better than ‘Umar.’ Then
he went out and came back and
said, ‘How did I swear, daughter?’ I told him what he
had said. Then he said, ‘He is
dearer to me although one’s
child is closer (to one’s
heart).’” 85. Ibn Abi Nu’m said, “I was
with Ibn ‘Umar when a man
asked him about the blood of
gnats. He asked, ‘Where are
you from?’ ‘From the people of
Iraq,’ he replied. He said, ‘Look at this man! He asks about the
blood of gnats when they
murdered the grandson of the
Prophet, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace! I heard the
Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, say, ‘They are
my sweet basil in this world.’” 46. Carrying a child on one’s
shoulders 86. Al-Bara’ said, “I saw the
Prophet, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace, when al-Hasan
was on his shoulder. He was
saying, ‘O Allah, I love him, so
love him.’” 47. A child is a source of joy 87. Jubayr ibn Nufayr said, “One
day we were sitting when al-
Miqdad ibn al-Aswad when a man
passed us. The man said,
‘Blessing be to those two eyes
which saw the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace. By Allah, I wish
that I had seen what you have
seen and witnessed what you
have witnessed!’ This angered
al-Miqdad and that surprised me as the man had said nothing but
good things. Then he turned to
them and said, ‘What made the
man desire to summon back
what Allah has taken away?
Does he not realise what his situation would be if he had seen
him? By Allah, if certain people
had been with the Messenger of
Allah, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace, Allah would
have thrown them on their faces into Hellfire since they would
neither have answered nor
confirmed him? Do you not praise
Allah Almighty since He brought
you forth and you only know
your Lord and confirm what your Prophet, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace, brought? You
see enough affliction in other
people. By Allah, the Messenger
of Allah, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace, was sent in the harshest state in which any
Prophet was ever sent – in a
gap (in the line of prophethood)
and the time of Ignorance. They
did not believe that the deen
was better than worshipping idols. He brought the
Discrimination by which it is
possible to discriminate between
the true and false, and which
can part a father from his child.
Then a man will think of his father, child or brother as an
unbeliever. Allah has loosened
the locks of his heart by faith
and he knows that the other
person will be destroyed in the
Fire. Therefore his eye is not cool since he knows that the one
he loves will be in the Fire. It is
what Allah says, “Those who
say, ‘Our Lord, give us joy in
our wives and
children.” (25:74)’” 48. A person who makes
supplication that his friend will
have a lot of money and many
children 88. Anas said, “One day I visited
the Prophet, may Allah bless him
and grant him peace, and there
was only myself, my mother and
my aunt, Umm Hiram. When he
came to us, he asked us, ‘Shall I pray with you?’ It was not the
time of an obligatory prayer.”
One of those listening to the
person relating this asked,
“Where did he put in Anas in
relation to him?” The reply was, “He put him to his right.” The
report from Anas continues,
“Then he prayed with us and
made supplication for us, the
people of the house, that we
would have the best of the blessings of this world and the
Next. My mother said,
‘Messenger of Allah, make
supplication to Allah for your
little servant,’ and he asked
Allah to grant me every blessing. At the end of his supplication, he
said, ‘O Allah, grant him a lot of
money and many children and
bless him!’” 49. Mothers are merciful 89. Anas ibn Malik said, “A
woman came to ‘A’isha and
‘A’isha gave her three dates.
She gave each of her two
children a date and kept one
date for herself. The children ate the two dates and then looked
at their mother. She took her
date and split in it two and gave
each child half of it. The Prophet,
may Allah bless him and grant
him peace, came and ‘A’isha told him about it. He said, ‘Are
you surprised at that? Allah will
show her mercy because of her
mercy towards her child.’” 50. Kissing Children 90. ‘A’isha said, “A bedouin
came to the Prophet, may Allah
bless him and grant him peace,
and asked, “Do you kiss your
children? We do not kiss them.’
The Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, ‘Can
I put mercy in your hearts after
Allah has removed it from
them?’” 91. Abu Hurayra said, “The
Messenger of Allah, may Allah
bless him and grant him peace,
kissed Hasan ibn ‘Ali while al-
Aqra’ ibn Habis at-Tamimi was
sitting with him. Al-Aqra’ observed, ‘I have ten children
and I have kissed any of them.’
The Messenger of Allah, may
Allah bless him and grant him
peace, looked at him and said,
‘Whoever does not show mercy will not be shown mercy.’” 51. The parent teaching adab
and his duty towards his child 92. Numayr ibn Aws said, “They
used to say, ‘Correct action is a
gift from Allah, but adab comes
from the parents.” 93. An-Nu’man ibn Bashir said
that his father had carried him
to the Messenger of Allah, may
Allah bless him and grant him
peace. He said, ‘Messenger of
Allah, I testify to you that I have given an-Nu’man such-and-such.
(It was a slave). The Prophet
asked, “Have you given each of
your children the same”?”
“No,” he replied. He said, “Then
testify to someone other than me.” Then the Prophet asked,
“Do you not want to show equal
kindness to all of them?”
“Indeed I do,” he replied. He
said, “Then do not do it.” 52. The dutifulness of a father
to his child 94. Ibn ‘Umar said, “Allah has
called them the ‘dutiful’ (al-
Abrar) because they are dutiful
(birr) to their parents and
children. Just as you have a duty
which you owe your parent, so you have a duty which you owe
your child.” 53. Someone who does not show
mercy will not be shown mercy 95. Abu Sa’id that the Prophet,
may Allah bless him and grant
him peace, said, ‘Someone who
does not show mercy will not be
shown mercy.” 96. Jarir ibn ‘Abdullah said, “The
Messenger of Allah, may Allah
bless him and grant him peace,
said, ‘Allah will not show mercy
to someone who does not show
mercy to people.” 97. Same as 97. 98. ‘A’isha said, “Some
bedouins came to the Prophet,
may Allah bless him and grant
him peace. One of their men said
to him, ‘Messenger of Allah, do
you kiss children? By Allah, we do not kiss them.’ The Messenger
of Allah, may Allah bless him and
grant him peace, said, ‘Can I put
mercy in your hearts after Allah
has removed it from them?’” 99. Abu ‘Uthman reported that
‘Umar wanted to appoint a man
as governor. The governor said,
“I have such-and-such a number
of children and I have never
kissed any of them.” ‘Umar said, “Allah Almighty will only
show mercy to the kindest of His
slaves.” 54. Mercy consists of a hundred
parts 100. Abu Hurayra reported that
the Messenger of Allah, may Allah
bless him and grant him peace,
said, “Allah Almighty has divided
mercy into one hundred parts.
He kept ninety-nine parts and sent down one part to earth.
Because of that one single part,
creatures are merciful to one
another so that even the mare
will lift its hooves away from its
foal so that it does not trample on it.”


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